my favorite hymn

by brisss (pronounced brie)

people often say, “brisss, hot potato by the wiggles is not a hymn.”

this is a surprisingly common misunderstanding.

it brings people together.

everybody knows the words.

it teaches valuable life skills involving temperature.

that sounds like a hymn to me.

some people think the potato itself is symbolic.

i agree.

the potato represents goodness.

it is dependable.

it has never betrayed me.

unlike pickles.

this is something people dont talk about enough.

a potato knows exactly what it is.

a pickle used to be a cucumber.

then one day it completely changed.

nobody asks why.

everybody just accepts it.

personally, i find that concerning.

people say, “brisss, its just pickling.”

Exactly.

if something can completely change its personality after sitting in a jar for a while, how am i supposed to trust it?

a potato would never do that.

a potato has integrity.

it wakes up every morning and chooses to remain a potato.

i respect that.

this is another reason hot potato is a hymn.

it celebrates one of natures most honest vegetables.

imagine if the song were called hot pickle.

nobody would sing it.

because nobody trusts a hot pickle.

i hope this clears things up.